Friday, January 13, 2012

Why would life ever be the same as today?

        The picture above has no relevance to the text below.    
Every night and every morning we get engulfed in this new hope, we want to fly, who doesn't want to touch the skies? And in this hope we have been living all along. If we were streams, we might fear of being emaciated! If we were the winds, we might fear of dissolving into oblivion. Youth bloomed, old age arrived but we never got old. I remember one story where a deep question has been raised. We were children, youth came upon us and we saw old age......the body changed, the habits changed and our mind changed but the 'I' within us remained unchanged. There were a thousand definitions for this 'I' and it got related with a million things....we cried, we laughed, we danced but within all these actions, the 'I' within us just remained a silent observer.......................and maybe at death, it will just keep on looking and say "Oh! I'm dying!"
                 I think a person's life can be decided by how much he did for the world and not by how he lived his life. I am not the one who searches for the definition of life. The great people who searched for the meaning of life died away without explaining their own lives.And there are a thousand examples of that......
                  A little bit of hope and a little bit of madness are the spices of life.A life devoid of a little bit of madness would certainly be so dull. Talking about madness, I suddenly remembered a mad man I had met at the asylum. Hehe don't you ever think that I had been admitted to the hospital. One day that guy was just staring at a spider hanging down a tree...I asked him," What are you staring at brother?" He replied,"The spider." I asked him with an intention to cheer him up," Haven't you ever seen a spider before?" His answer shocked me because he sounded like some enlightened yogi about whom I had read a lot in the books,"Do you know? The spider hanging on that tree is me!" Maybe the words came out from him due to the reaction of the tranquilizers he had been taking or maybe he had experiencing that mystic feeling of being one with the universe........that the soul of everything is but one..
I have heard that some scientists claim that madness is one natural quality that every human possesses! The Hitler that killed millions of Jews is said to have created beautiful paintings!! His subordinate, Adolf Eichmann, being interrogated and analysed after the war, is said to have turned out completely normal!! They say the doctors were shocked when he was found to be totally normal when they had expected him to be possessed by devils. That's why, maybe some scientists say that the normal people live within mental hospitals and the insane are out on the streets.... 
                  If I say the world is strange then it will just be a cliche. When I say we can never understand its ways then the people who think that they have understood something, done something might feel bad. So i think its better to confess that this world is a beautiful place....where is the moment when I felt so low and wept? When I had thought that the world had ended for me!!!Where has my childishness gone??It's the same me but why can't I be carefree like I was?? Still it's the same me....where has the moment gone, when we had burned with anger as Argentina had lost the game?? Where have all the seconds been imprisoned, the time when I had gone on my first date? What had I felt then? I had wished the pleasant time never to end ...when those touches and her scent had lingered around me, I had wished them never to fade and I had  promised that I would cherish those feelings till my deathbed...But now when I try to remember..I can't recall what kinda clothes my girlfriend had been wearing during that time! I can't remember anything...and I wonder was I never there? 
                      It was surely me who had promised to bring down the stars for her. It was me who used to defecate climbing upon the plum tree..It was me who would hide the face in the camouflage of 'banmaaraa' leaves and go for a peep show outside the windows of married people.......Oh,My! Where have all the days gone?? Where has the 'me' gone??
                     We are flowing like the rivers but our oceans are different...we are flying like the birds but our nests are different..We are watching the world through different eyes and what we see is the truth for each one of us. What we feel is the life for us. Whatever is near us is what we call ours.. 
                        Now I need to sleep but I can't be sure who gets up on this bed tomorrow...He could be some other person..He could be someone new to this world or some old old man with broken dreams.........Who knows what tomorrow has for us?? But whatever state my mind may be in, tomorrow when I wake will be 'me' that wakes up. However chilly tomorrow morning might be, the shivering person will be me. If the sun will be embracing the morning with his warmth, it will be 'me' who will be basking. A day might have been reduced from the days I have to spend on this earth but it will be 'me' who will hopefully elongate the day into 24 hours....................

No comments:

You may also like